So Monday, I decided that I had no other choice but to drive myself to have the lab work done. There are a couple different reasons this was a VERY BAD IDEA! So mother in law went with me. But she cant drive, it was more for moral support than anything else and to call someone if things went badly.
I was nervous from the very beginning but it needed to be done, so I put my big girl panties on and was going to get it done. So she got in the car and I opened the gate and backed the car out, closed the gate and had to sit for a few minutes to catch my breath. It is crazy to me just how much we take easy breathing for granted. Exertion=coughing=exhaustion. But on we went.
I drive to the lab using the GPS mind you. Easy Peasy... right? WRONG! I in my infinite wisdom was so nervous that I missed my turn. Panic starts to creep in. I go up and find a place to turn around. Get back on track and get to the lab. Find a parking spot and and go in and wait for 45 minutes to get probably one of the most uninterested, unfriendly lab techs I have ever met. I just wanted to be nice to her and asked how her day was going and she didn't even acknowledge that I was speaking to her. Yes my vocabulary is a little slow but not incomprehensible. Thank you for making me feel even more unimportant and invisible than I already did.
So while I am out already, I decided to drive to the vet which was pretty much a straight shot from the lab and only 6 minutes away. I needed to pick up flea medicine. That was the smoothest part of my day even though it included a 25 minute wait for them to fill the meds. Because your girl didn't realize that I had to call and ask for it in advance. But I got it.
Since I had drug mother in law out and made her ride around with me, figured I would stop somewhere ON THE WAY home and get her some lunch. She enjoys our little lunch picnics. So she told me to go around the corner and get on a certain street and we stopped at KFC to have lunch. Went thru the drive thru and took a much needed break to just relax my brain. I was tired. OR so I thought.
I set the GPS for home. Somehow I hit the wrong route and didn't notice it. I had already set in my head that I was nowhere near ready for the interstate so I set the GPS for the route that didn't include the interstate. OR again SO I THOUGHT! Apparently my brain had had enough at this point. When I realized that I was headed for the interstate there was no turning back. Panic attack #2 sets in and my head starts pounding.
When I finally make it home, I have to sit in the car and just rest my brain for a few minutes before I can even get out of the car to open the gate. Needless to say when I got the car in and the gate closed and got mother in law in the house, I NEEDED A NAP. My head was hurting so bad.
Joy at www.adventureunraveled.com gave me a list of things that I needed to do to let my brain heal and gave me another way of looking at why I am so tired with doing next to nothing. I never thought about my brain telling my body that it couldn't handle anymore that it needed to shut down. Shut down=EXHAUSTION! Thanks Joy for being my friend and always looking out for me. Even when I am hard headed and don't listen.
Note to self: you just had a stroke. You are not ready to drive. You are not superwoman. You will get there, But you have to rest your brain in order for it to heal.
So another day in the life of learning how to deal with not being who you once were. Thank you for following my journey as I am learning to just be me while Chasing My Serenity.