Numbers

RULE NUMBER ONE: BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

I have struggled with this my whole life. I believe in most people. I believe in their abilities, in their dreams, in their accomplishments. But most days I struggle with believing in my own. I feel like this started when I was eight and being told that I wasn't wanted by my birth mom. I mean come on if your own mom doesn't want you then why would anyone else. And there without warning was the seed planted for self doubt.

This phrase was repeated back to me a number of times over the years of my life. Every time it sat a little harder. Every time the self doubt rooted a little deeper. It got pretty bad in middle school when it was stated by a bully. I definitely wasn't anything to look at with my fluffy FRO and glasses and clothes that didn't fit the way they were supposed to. I didn't have a whole lot of friends and the self doubt just kept growing.

Honestly to this day I am 46 years old and I still struggle with not being enough. My relationships fail because I am not good enough, my business fails because I am not good enough. I don't have it together because what is the point; its just going to fail.

So I don't have it together. That doesn't mean I shouldn't try. My question from the very beginning should have been; If I don't believe in myself then why should anyone else? The Bible says we are fearfully and wonderfully made. It also says that we are made in HIS image. So who am I to say I am not good enough? Is that me saying that Jesus wasn't Good enough?

So today, lets start something new. My story isn't over yet. So from today forward I am going to find something about myself that I believe in. Believe in yourself. Today I am going to believe in my ability to continue to write my story even when its hard. Today it was hard!

There are 365 new chapters to write in every year. Make every day count and live them out loud. ONE NUMBER AT A TIME!

Sincerely Me, Chasing My Serenity